hello friends 
welp, once again, lately i’m finding myself deep in thought about who i really wanna be and what i truly want out of my life. hmmm you’d think by your early 30’s one might have or should have already figured that out! 
(or, maybe not…)
as much as i try to promote a moderate take on most things in my world, in reality i end up making situations either very simplistic and to the point, or quite complicated and convoluted (as you consistently witness if you read my blog. LOL.).
the simplistic side is my innate nature; the complicated side has been born from all the struggles i’ve gone through and i’ve somehow come to be this perfectionistic freak that has to dissect EVERYthing, make assumptions about emotions and theorize how things got from path A to path B.
i waste a lot of time stewing about why something happened, what i can do to change it and makes sure it’s better next time. notice i said waste. is stewing and delving a contructive use of my energy and time? most times i think not. especially now that it’s becoming clearer to me that im missing out on a lot of life’s joys by trying to be some omniscient problem solver.
am i making sense so far? hopefully you can somehow relate. cause ya know, that’s why i blog—in hopes that i’m not the only crazy one! hehe.
anyhoo, even tho i’m sure you’re prolly expecting a superdooper long-winded explanation of the secret o’ life— SURPRISE!! i think i’m starting to understand the secret isnt just one or two specifics or even a top 10 list of things you should do to get the most out of your life.
instead, its an all-encompassing foundation we should weave into every twist and turn in our lives, every journey uphill and downhill, every person we meet, every laugh line we grow on our cheeks, and every sad or proud tear we shed.
and being a Christian, i believe, fervently, deep down in my heart that God wants us to give Him the burden of the world we try to carry on our shoulders on a daily basis and RELISH this gift of life he has given us.
we simply should not worry about trying to figure it all out. its not our job. if you’re like me and you’re exhausted from seeking answers to all your questions, maybe you should just enjoy the ride…
James Taylor, The Secret O’ Life.
the secret of life is enjoying the passage of time
any fool can do it
there aint nothing to it
nobody knows how we got to
the top of the hill
but since were on our way down
we might as well enjoy the ride
the secret of love is in opening up your heart
its okay to feel afraid
but dont let that stand in your way
cause anyone knows that love is the only road
and since were only here for a while
might as well show some style
give us a smile
isnt it a lovely ride
sliding down
gliding down
try not to try too hard
its just a lovely ride
now the thing about time is that time
isnt really real
its just your point of view
how does it feel for you
einstein said he could never understand it all
planets spinning through space
the smile upon your face
welcome to the human race
some kind of lovely ride
i’ll be sliding down
i’ll be gliding down
try not to try too hard
its just a lovely ride
isnt it a lovely ride
slidin down
glidin down
try not to try too hard
its just a lovely ride
so enjoy the passage of time, huh? it’s all about being present, in the moment. take heart the miracle of emotions we can feel—joy, anguish, fear, pride, elation, love, belief, grief, gratefulness…grasp them tightly with your very soul, breathe them, cherish them.
i personally dont feel i should just coast thru life egotistically numb to circumstances and withholding compassion so i can enjoy life to the fullest with no responsibility. i dont think i should relinquish my child-like wonder of creation and the world or stop searching for answers to them. i also feel that i should continually strive to learn more about my interests and passions, so i can become a better person and help others.
but there’s a point where we step over a line and become the gods of our own little world and it ruins the beauty of what life’s all about.
it’s really all so complicatedly simple. and instead of withering away my time over-analyzing parts of my life that i honestly know i have no control over, i should embrace what comes, good or bad, and give simple thanks God has given me His breath of life to spend time on this earth. and move on. i know, i know, that’s hard (sometimes seemingly impossible or worthless) when life’s hard. but its a conscious choice—and if we want the most out of this lifetime, we will choose joy in the midst of even the most trying times.
people will see and feel your spirit and they will be blessed by it.
give. love. forgive. play. hurt. seek God’s will. understand. enjoy the passage of time…
we only have a little.
reminded me that tough times will eventually pass! and i’ll be stronger for it after it’s all over 
